Friday, 24 August 2012

Feeling sad

I'd resisted from posting this mini whinge last week, cos I'm trying to be more positive and whine less, but damnit(!), I'm annoyed again!

Over the last few weeks, we've posted and handed out a bunch of save the dates. Ok, by the nature of a save the date, you don't really need to respond, but I'm super upset at how many of my family and friends haven't bothered to call, write, tweet, text, facebook...whatever to say 'hey, thanks! How awesome that we're going to be invited to your wedding!' I can recall about five people who've made the effort to let me know they received it and say thanks. Sure, all the people who we've given them to in person have been super excited and that's awesome.

In my opinion, being invited to someone's wedding is a huge honour. By getting a save the date, you are being told you're getting an invite. By being invited, we are asking you to share the biggest day of our lives with us. When weddings cost so much money and headcounts are often restricted by venues, it's super hard to decide who to invite and who not to invite. So it really hurts when people who have 'made the cut' don't just let me know they received theirs and are excited or happy about it.

The main bulk of our guests are family. The vast majority of them have already had their save the dates. For my own family to more or less ignore the honour of being invited, well... that really sucks. Just cos you're family, doesn't guarantee you an invite. So please, just say thank you!

And for friends to not say anything, hurts maybe a teeny bit more. We've not invited that many friends (we don't have the room to and I don't have that many), so it makes me feel pretty crap. The crazy part of my brain (which I increasingly find I need to surpress) says 'am I labouring under some pretence that these people are really my friends? Am I that crazy person who thinks she's still friends with these people?'

I try not to let stuff like this get to me and try to be happy Sam. But I've been trying to surpress this sadness for a while now and it had to come out at some point. The fact that I'm home alone and feeling pretty miserable probably has something to do with it.

I just needed to get that out there. I don't care that my guests (probably) won't see this, I'm hoping I will feel a little better about it now that I've got it off my chest.

12 comments:

  1. Sorry it got you down lady, but a save the date is typically just information only and does not formally require any acknowledgement of reciept. There is a whole bunch of ettiquette stuff online that you can read if it helps settle your mind a bit?

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  2. Yeah, I know people don't need to reply or anything, I guess I just thought everyone else would be as excited about my wedding as I am. And that excitement would translate as a text saying 'yay' or something.

    I know I'm being super oversensitive and a big girl. I guess I'm just disappointed that I'm not showered with exclamations of excitement. Let's hope it isn't this much of an anticlimax when I send the real invites out ;)

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  3. When you get your actual invites it'll be much more of an excitement frenzy I promise!! :)

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  4. I had like 7 proper rsvp's to the wedding. And some of them were later than the date I had specified. It's annoying but I guess people do things differently now?

    I am super duper excited to be invited to your wedding. Just in case you didn't know ;)

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    Replies
    1. I do know :) I know I didn't rsvp you, but you knew I was coming and was excited cos I spoke to you about it every day :) I don't expect rsvps or anything, just wanted some excited texts or something. Bumfaces! :D

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  5. It's hard hey? I seriously think people need suuuuper specific instructions with threats in order to ilicit any response more than a facebook like these days. I'd be like "you must RSVP by this date or you are NOT INVITED ANYMORE". Anyway I'm sorry nobody's saying anything because clearly it's a huge day for you and you guys are so excited, but please try not to take it too personally.

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  6. Awww Sam :0( I don't like that you are sad! We only just got ours but you knew that coz I messaged. Try not to take it to heart. I'd be the same though. I bet every single person is super excited about your day. You are going to be a beautiful bride and G will be a handsome bear. We can wait! Message me if you need to chat xxxx

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  7. Awh Sam, sorry this has gotten you down. I know they don't require a formal reply but like you, I would hope that I'd get a few excited messages! Thinking of you and hope you start to feel brighter x

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Claire :) I felt much better as soon as I could see real people to whinge to ;) x

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I'm Sam. I'm 26 and live in Rogerstone. Expect cats.

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